In Loving Memory for Natasha Mitrovic 11/10/80 - 20/7/07

A journey in time

NATASHA MITROVIC
Jul 27, 2007


I ask for your forgiveness Natasha, first and foremost since your number 2 Ugly Duckling has writer's block. You were always the better storyteller than I was. I'm only a pseudo-writer on paper and at this moment I cannot even begin my story.

Words, thoughts, descriptions of you written by me will only diminish the very essence of who you are as a person. So this is why I ask for your forgiveness. I close my eyes and reminisce about all the memories I have of you and they are infinite. It is impossible for me to sum up a story, an experience, an idea or a thought for there are endless doors and pathways that I keep picturing all the times I shared with you. So forgive me darling, you're my Serbian Warrior Princess, my number one Ugly Duckling, my partner in crime, my best friend, my sister and so much more. The relationship we have borders no limits. There were no boundaries my love. Remember how we used to try to describe our relationship with each other to other people. You would start and I would interrupt and say, "Well you see, she's my sister a lifetime before so that makes her my sister now, she's also my best friend, husband, wife, brother, mother, father and whatever other relation you can think of all rolled into one. We are the perfect combination because we alternate and jump all around from one to another according to whatever our heart desires for that moment."

You are my diamond Natasha, only you know what you mean to me. Wherever we were we'd always talk about one or the other. It did not matter what people thought of us for we follow our hearts. When it came to the matters of the heart we were fearless. I'd share one story and you would listen. You would say how you felt according to what you thought at that time. Complete and utter brutal honesty to how we thought and felt was the order of the day. That was why we grew; the freedom of knowing each other so well strikes the very core of my soul, my inner-being. So I ask for your forgiveness for my words do you no justice. You are the most amazing passionate independent woman I have ever met. Your aura would emanate so fiercely that anyone who stood in your presence would immediately be aware of you. There was never a dull moment and we would have moments of sitting in front of each other in complete silence and when either one would break the silence we would laugh because we understood each other so completely or we would talk endlessly and go from idea to thought to experience and randomly go back and forth without missing a beat while others would get lost in the process of our thinking; we'd understand immediately. The little intricacies of our thought patterns, habits or endless mood swings were synchronized.

So forgive me darling because it's you and me, me and you, Natasha and Angel, Angel and Natasha. You gave me the courage and strength to use my heart more, you gave me the will to fight when I was suffering, you gave me your heart whenever I needed you, you gave me everything and so much more. G-d I must sound selfish because I'm talking about myself and not you. What do I say Natasha? You know how I am...I want people to know that you feel with your heart, that you are a compassionate person, you're thoughtful and sweet as well as strong and fierce. You were never afraid of saying what you felt and you did what your heart desired. You seized the day. You lived each day to the fullest and that is why I admire you so much. You are the Queen of Life, you represent how one should live fully without question or doubt and without hesitation. You are the greatest guardian and mentor I ever had. To live a life with knowing who you are as a person, what you want to accomplish and having a confidence that is so profound always humbled me. For you saved my life Natasha. In the beginning of this year when no one else knew about my heart problems, you saved me. You brought me back to life my love. That night in your apartment when I could not breathe...YOU SAVED ME. You saved my life darling. You are my hero, my guardian, my sister, my best friend, my everything and I want others to know that your heart expands so infinitely that it is such an HONOR to have met you. I have the privilege of truly knowing who you are as a human being. So please forgive my short story of you.

I pray for your love, your kindness, your soul, and the people you have touched with your heart and left an impact in their lives.

I will always lub you Natasha for I pray for your well-being. Wherever you are, may G-d give you Eternal Peace. I will see you in heaven one day as promised. Peace be with you always my love and thank you for always watching out for me. You will be forever missed by me.

Love always,

your Angel